Wallahi i need to improve myself. And we all do.
There are many things that i have come to realise in this
wonderful month of Self Reflection. (Ramadan 2014)
You cannot be 'practising' if you are not practising the deen.
-And, practising the deen consists of
many voluntary ibaada (worship) that brings you
closer to Allah SubhanaWa'ta'Ala.
-In this wonderful Ramadan i have realised that i am not taking that much action against time itself to benefit from it 'Time' truly. It's like i am sitting and waiting for opportunity, but i am not actively running around seeking success.
Okay, you might be slightly confused, but what i mean is that, as i came to the mosque i was so delighted to see regular faces and all those sisters who i usually see every Ramadan. At the beginning you do a quick catch up, like hey, what have you been up to this year etc etc... and just then your mind goes
POP! as they list ALL the enriching acomplishments they have surpassed. Some people tell you they learnt Arabic this year, some say they have learnt the Tafsir of the Quran, some say they got married or had children, some shock you and say things like i went to study in Madina/Makkah/Egypt etc etc..
All the while i am just here like.
WOWWWWWWWWWWWWW (Maa Shaa Allah)... Have i really entered the mosque from one Ramadan to the next just the
same as i was since i last left.
SubhanAllah.
Like i said:
Time.
It is so precious. And my value for it has magnified greatly this eye opening month. One evening i sat by my prayer mat after i finished praying. And the clock was ticking on the wall ahead of me, tick, tock, tick, tock, not stopping, not waiting, just moving, constantly ticking. Minutes passed by my very eyes, whilst i was just fascinated, and astonished by the terrifying beauty in time.
And all the while, this past year i haven't really made a
'wowing' change since the last Ramadan.
Here's a metaphor to help you understand;
**Let's say the road to being a true Muslim is full of long flights of stairs, and pathways.**
So, Am i really 'practising'? If i am not walking up the stairs any longer, what if i have just stopped walking up the stairs and this past year i have been sitting on the same step breathless. You know what i noticed? As soon as you start practising you walk up the stairs fast, then you start jogging, and then sprinting up the stairs, until you get to the tricky parts, you see hurdles and you hop over them, sometimes they knock you down, and you get back up running faster. But this year, it is as though i stopped at one step, and rested, and fell asleep, because this Ramadan i just woke up. I woke up realising how much is ahead of me, and it is time. For me to start again, the jogging and sprinting, for me to climb up again.
Thank you, Ya Allah, for opening my eyes to seeing this, because a lot of people fall asleep on this one step and don't wake up until the Angel of death comes to them. And i seek refuge in Allah from that.
-So i must get up, become more active in seeking opportunities whilst i am young. And look for Islamic classes to learn the Deen, Arabic and Quran. To implement sincerely and firmly what i already know. E.g. night prayers, reciting even more regularly, and being active in giving more charity.
To act upon basic Islamic manners such as respect, being more polite and friendly, listening, advising and understanding people, being shy, and being truthful.
To enhance my humility and humbleness to my Creator who is
All-Seeing, All aware.
And to
never, ever, delay or procastinate away from a deed; because if you lose the grip, it spills wild. So i need to
race and compete in attaining good deeds.
And ultimately realise that all my actions are for
The One and Only Ever living, Eternal one, the Most-Majestic, Most-Merciful Lord.
